Working Blind Episode two – Caitlin Hernandez, Blind Teacher

Caitlin Hernandez lives in San Francisco and works as a teacher.

I chatted to her about her education, what made her become a teacher and the adaptations she uses to teach students who are sighted but have other disabilities.

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Transcript

Intro;
Working blind: sharing the stories of working blind people from across the globe.
Holly: Hi, and welcome to another episode of Working Blind. This week, I’m with Caitlin Hernandez, who is a teacher from San Fransisco.
Dialogue start:
Holly: Hi Caitlin, thanks for joining me.
Caitlin: Hi, thanks so much for having me.
Holly: So, you’re a teacher. Can you tell us a bit about the students you teach, what age group, ETC.?
Caitlin: Yes, I teach um, third and fourth graders with disabilities. That’s everything from reading and learning, and behavioral disabilities, to students who have an identified disability of some sort and we may not know precisely what it is, but they need extra help with anything from reading, writing, math, social skills, ETC. and I pull them out of class in small groups and/or sometimes I push into their general education classroom and support them there. And then I’m in charge of running IEP meetings, writing out their IEPS, that’s Individualized Education Program, for students with disabilities who need accommodations or modifications so that they can access the general education curriculum with their peers.
Holly: ok, that’s really cool. So rather than being a special education teacher, who travels around, you actually work at a school, right?
Caitlin: Yes, exactly. So I have all the third and fourth graders with IEPS. I teach at a kindergarten through eighth grade school, so it’s kind of cool because once they leave forth grade they actually go up into fifth grade , which is at another campus a couple blocks away, but I still get to see them. Um. So it’s really nice, you kind of get that it’s very much a family feel kind of school. And also obviously, I get to keep my third graders for two years, cause they roll up to forth grade and I still have them. So I really like that about the school I teach in.
Holly: How long have you been teaching there?
Caitlin: This is my second year there. Although last year I taught fifth and sixth grade at the other campus, and this time I moved to third and forth which is where I really wanted to be. So I anticipate staying there for the next little while, unless something random happens in my life, and I move or something.
Holly: haha. That’s really cool. How long have you been a teacher? Is this your first full time teaching job, or have you been doing it for longer than this?
Caitlin This is my, technically my third year teaching. There was a big debacle with my school district, because they’d never had a totally blind teacher before. So my first year was very fragmented. I was actually at three different schools while we tried to figure out what I would need in a reader assistant. So somebody who would help me with making sure students are being you know physically safe, and helping me with paperwork and all the sort of visual things that I would need assistance with as a blind person. So, because it took so long to get all that squared away, even though I had already been hired, the first year was just very broken up and not ideal. So I sort of view this year as my second full year of teaching. Um, but before those first three years if you want to count that first year as a year , also I student-taught. So I would say I’ve been you know tteaching for the past four years or so , but again this is what I feel my first, or sorry my second year full time year of teaching.
Holly: Wow yeah, that first year definitely sounds quite stressful.
Caitlin: Oh yeah, it was not cool.
Holly: Do you think that’s fairly typical for blind teachers or disabled teachers in general, that when they come into the job there might not be a lot of understanding of what you need?
Caitlin: Yeah! I do. I mean, I think this is probably why a lot of blind folks teach blind children, just because and even with that, I assume there are sometimes issues with people saying, well how will you do this, and that and the other thing. Is it safe, and which is so ironic right, because we know better than anybody what blind students need but there’s so much ignorance around us being able to work and keep children. I do think it’s very typical, and it’s unfortunate, but I do hope that now I am seeing more blind teachers wanting to work with sighted children so there are hopefully going to be more precedence to follow because you know we’re doing that now and there will be other cases for incoming blind teachers to indicate to their district. It was really hard for me to find blind teachers teaching sighted children with disabilities. I think a lot of blind teachers teach either blind children or they teach general education, like they have a classroom of kids that they stick with all year and those kids do not have disabilities. So it’s sort of an interesting case I guess mine is, because it’s not blind children but it is disabled children. Who may or may not need some additional care or have other physical or behavioral difficulties that you really need a sighted person on hand to assist with just because as a blind person you don’t always know what’s going on. If they’re nonverbal, or if they’re acting out in a physical way that’s unsafe for them or the other students.
Holly: Yeah, and kids are, I don’t want to say sneaky, but they know what they’re doing.
Caitlin: Haha, They totally are, yes!
Holly: and with you, when you were growing up, did you have disabled teachers as role models, or what made you want to become a teacher? You know, did you see other disabled in that career field?
Caitlin; You know, I never had a blind teacher other than when I went to blind camps for the summer. You know, like I went to a couple of technology camps and things like that, and I feel like I knew a couple of blind adults, but not like really well. Um, and I definitely didn’t know folks with other kinds of disabilities, and that’s one thing I’ve really enjoyed in my adulthood is meeting people who aren’t blind but are disabled in other ways, and there’s such a sense of community and shared understanding there. I think I wanted to be a teacher because I really had some wonderful teachers, not disabled, but who were willing to teach me in ways that worked for me and just were very kind and inclusive. I really loved my years in elementary, middle and high school, and I think that was largely because I had really good general education teachers and also really good Braille and mobility teachers who I’m still in touch with today. So even though I didn’t have disabled teachers, I would definitely say that the teachers I had just had a huge impact on me. Um, and I really just wanted to pay that forward and I just really love kids also, and my mom is a Para-Professional in a special education setting, so I would go with her over the summer and hang out with kids in like special day classes, and I just really enjoyed it. And I also enjoyed that you got to keep them over years and sort of watch them grow up. And so that was also what drew me to special education because you get to have those sort of more intimate one-to-one longer lasting relationships with students, as opposed to you know having a class of thirty or God forbid like you know I wanted to do middle school English for a while, but that’s like 200 kids.
Holly: haha
C; I was like, I can’t do that! You know, I just feel like I do my best work in smaller settings when I can really get to know the students and how they learn, and what they need. I just get to know them as people and really connect with them. That’s kind of, I rely on that a lot, to really forge that student-teacher relationship.
Holly: Yeah, it’s much more personal isn’t it than say if you’ve got lots and lots of children who you obviously like and can get to know to a certain degree , but when you’re spending much more time with kids you definitely get to know them a bit better.
Caitlin: Yeah, and you know, really build that trust and that willingness to teach and be taught by them too. Cause you know it’s so cliché, but I really do learn a lot from my kids because they, haha I feel so old, because they come in and they’re talking about stuff and I’m like what is this now? What is this game, what is this show, and like just the way that they look at things. Like no pun intended, they like see things an a way that I don’t, and it’s really interesting to me. You know, asking them how are you doing this? What are you thinking, and just getting them to articulate that is so beneficial for me and for other students in the group, because we end up doing things so many different ways, especially like in math. It’s been such a challenge for me to do math with these visual concepts and just, I have a lot of kids who are very visual. So it’s just, it’s interesting for me to see how they all learn. We do a lot of talking and you know sharing what’s going on in our brains in my room and I really enjoy that.
Holly: That sounds really great. When you were in school, did you have access to, well you mentioned Braille and mobility teachers, so what was your kind of education like?
Caitlin: I was mainstreamed all through kindergarten through high school and obviously into college. I did go to a Pre-School that was half special day and half general education, and then I received full out services for Braille and mobility, technically all the way through high school, but really my Braille teachers after you know I was probably done with Braille. I started at 3 and was probably done by like 6 or 7. So they just supported with math and making sure that I had everything in Braille. Then they would push in as I got older like for math and science and things that were more visual where I needed more one-to-one support. Then mobility was mostly pull out to learn my community and my classrooms and my school and all that. So yeah, I had mostly just itinerant support and then again I went to a couple of tech things over the summer to help me with like assistive technology.
Holly: That’s really cool. When you went to college, how did you make a decision about what college you were going to go to? Did you know at that point you wanted to be a teacher or were you looking at other things?
Caitlin: Yeah, I decided to go on the teacher track, I think it was my sophomore year of high school, when the department of rehabilitation works with you to make like a career plan. So you kind of have to decide on something, and the teacher route seemed again the most enjoyable just because I’d had some experience in the classroom and I had tutored and helped out with some camps with younger blind students. So I felt at home there and I felt it was a good choice in terms of moving on to college. And then I knew I wanted to go to UC Santa Cruz for like ridiculous reasons, mostly I just love the town of Santa Cruz.
Holly: Hha
Caitlin: You know, it’s a really fun hippy chill town. Um, and I’d grown up going to the beach boardwalk as a kid, and I like the ice cream store. Like very terrible reasons looking back, but I did go there. I went and visited, and I knew that I would study, they didn’t have an education major so I knew I would just study literature, because I love to write and I love to read. So I was just like ok, I’ll do literature and go to grad school later and get my masters in Education and my teaching credential. So I went and checked out the literature department a little bit and talked to the Disability Resource Center, (DRC), over there just to find out what accommodations and support I could get, and they were honest. They hadn’t had a blind student who read Braille in a really long time. I think they said like 10 years or something, but they knew what to do. And you know, we just talked it out, and I knew it would be a good fit. They also had a really helpful transportation service for disabled students that would get you to class, because it’s a really rugged huge woodsy campus. So that was probably partially why they didn’t, I think, have many blind students. Cause no one’s like fool enough to go there, because it’s just really difficult, and I’m like terrible at mobility. So I was like, maybe I shouldn’t go here, but they were like oh no, we have this service that can help you. So don’t let that stand in your way. And I’m so glad I didn’t, because it was really just like a gem of a college. I think, looking back, I really did have my hand held by them. They were so helpful that when I went to grad school it was kind of a rude awakening, but it was nice because there were of course some struggles, like advocating for what I needed but they were right there to help me. I think that really prepared me to know what I would need when I went to grad school., and then I felt more equipped to like really fight for my rights and my multimedia and all that I needed to participate in it. And also just let me enjoy college, and be you know a young adult and learn how to live that kind of life, you know?
Holly: Haha
Caitlin: So I appreciated that.
Holly: Yeah, everyone else is getting to enjoy college and have that experience.
Caitlin: Exactly!
Holly: I think we often see like if we don’t have to advocate constantly, we’re like I’m so lucky! And I guess we are, butt at the same time, we shouldn’t have to, we should be able to enjoy college and have a good time.
Caitlin: Yeah, exactly.
Holly: You said grad school was a bit of a rude awakening. Did you expect it to be accessible, considering you were studying special education, and was that your experience?
Caitlin: Yeah, I mean so I went to San Fransisco State, which actually ironically houses the program that trains the folks that teach blind students. So I was like, they should know what to do. Even though I wasn’t in that program, I was in the mild to moderate disabilities program, and they were great. The program was great, the part that was kind of weird was that so many disabled students go to that school, that you were literally just a number to their disability programs and resource center. They did not know who I was or what I needed, and I was just really used to Santa Cruz, where I was literally you know, I think we actually did have 1 other totally blind student, but they really totally knew me and my preferences and I just felt like they knew we weren’t all the same. It was just different. There was nothing really wrong, it just felt very impersonal. And I really had to do a lot more advocating with my professors because the Disability programs and resource center just was not equipped to do that. It became pretty clear to me that they were just very overwhelmed. And didn’t really you know, they could only do so much. So it went fine, but I was glad I had the time to do it, and I was at a commuter school. SF State, I was not living oncampus so, I wasn’t doing all the same fun social things I did during undergrad. So I just did all that stuff on my own time. Then I dealt with school, which was fine.
Holly: Yeah, and were the people in your program encouraging of you as a blind student going into special education?
Caitlin: Yes, my professors were really excited and very eager to make it work. And I think they kind of had some concerns about what was going to happen further down the line, but they did their best to teach me and equip me with as best they could and you know, they observed my student teaching, and yeah they were really helpful and encouraging. I actually started grad school initially at Santa Cruz, to teach English and those folks were not encouraging. They were like how will you be a blind teacher? They actually said, that if they couldn’t find me a student-teaching placement, I would have to leave the program. And I was like well, are you saying that to your sighted non-disabled students? They were like, well no. We just don’t know if anyone’s gonna you know, want to have you as as a student teacher because it’s a liability. So that was one of the reasons why I left, because it was just like instead of trying to work with me, they were just really like how are you going to do this. How are you going to do that? They weren’t actively helping me find solutions. Then again, I was like I feel like I would deal with that much differently now, because I’m older and I’m more equipped to fight these battles, but when you just finish undergrad yu’re just learning how to adult. And I was just like, if they don’t want me here then I’m leaving.
Holly: That’s really tough.
Caitlin: Right! You know, and in hindsight, I thik that was a good choice because it really got me to pause and think about again, why do I want to be a teacher. Do I really want to have like 200 students, and teach to the test. Because really that’s what high school English has become. You don’t unfortunately get to choose your books and sit around and have really cool conversations and write stories of kids. You’re teaching them the things they need to know to pass these tests. I mean, obviously that’s drastically oversimplifying it, but because they were so narrow-minded about my wanting to be a teacher, it just really got me to think. Do I really want this badly enough to fight this battle, and I was kind of like no, maybe I won’t actually really even enjoy it as much as I think I will and maybe this other program will be a better fit at SF State.
Holly: Yeah, and I guess in the end you found a job that you actually like, so it probably worked out.
Caitlin: Yeah! I mean, right… Who knows, I might’ve really liked teaching high school, but I don’t even know. I really feel like I made the right choice, and I’m definitely really happy where I am right now. And it’s sort of amazing to me to look back at you know, the long road to get here and to finally be like I finally found it and I have a wonderful reader’s assistant. And it sort of surprises me to realize that finally I’m coasting along smoothly, because it feels like a really long road. But it’s worth it! I found it.
Holly: And what kind of, so you say you have a reader who assists you, is that the only kind of accommodation you have in your job? Or do you make use of different adaptations?
Caitlin: So, I have my reader’s assistant. She again helps make sure that everyone is physically safe. If a person is nonverbal, she’ll prompt me. She says it looks like this person is stuck on this problem or whatnot. But mostly obviously the kids are old enough that they’ll tell me themselves and they know obviously if they raise their hand I’m not going to notice. Haha So they speak up.
Holly: Haha
Caitlin: But it’s also just helpful to have another pair of eyes in the classroom to just make sure everybody’s doing okay, because some of my groups are kind of big. I think the biggest is like 6 students at a time. So it can get a little wild sometimes because at the end of the day they’re little kids and they, like you said, they’re sneaky and they do different things.
Holly: Haha
Caitlin: Then I just have my technology. So I have a laptop. Everybody can apply for a district issued laptop, so I just loaded NVDA onto it. So I use that screen reader, and I have a Braille-Note Touch that my district got. So I mostly just use that all day long, to read along with them and keep notes on their progress and do all that. I’m trying to think what else… Uh, my principal is fantastic. My whole admin is just great, and they try to obviously email me stuff electronically for like staff meetings and things like that so I can keep up. Yeah, I feel like there’s not a ton of accommodations honestly. Obviously there’s stuff that I can’t access if it’s printed materials. Then I do have a scanner so I can scan it, or I just have my reader go over it with me. But there’s really, once you have your materials and your classroom setup, then you kind of get into a groove. I think people really think that teaching is a visual thing, and to some degree of course it is and everything seems that way to a sighted person. But it’s really at the end of the day, it sounds schmaltzy but it’s really about getting to know the kids and how they learn, and being willing to think outside the box and do things in different ways. And I think that as a disabled person, that’s just so intuitive to me. It’s like I do things differently too. So it’s not really very difficult for me. Luckily I’ve had parents who are really chill, and they’re excited to have a disabled teacher teaching their kids and being a role model and I’m really happy that I can do that cause again, I didn’t have any disabled teachers and I wish that I had. I think it’s kind of comforting to them to see that I do things differently and that sometimes I get real confused at the math and I struggle with things because we all do.
Holly: Oh God yes!
Caitlin: Yeah, so I think it’s helpful in a lot of ways for them to have a disabled teacher. I think there’s sort of this intimacy and comfort that kind of comes from them knowing that I really understand where they’re coming from a lot of the time, even if our challenges are different.
Holly: Yeah… Do you think being blind does help you empathize with your students more, not necessarily more than a teacher who isn’t disabled, but maybe on a more specific level?
Caitlin: I do yeah, and it’s interesting, because like you said, kids are still kids. They’re gonna do ridiculous things, but at the end of the day I do know they empathize with me as I do with them and they’re often very helpful and understanding. And I just love how they’ll explain visual things like what they’re drawing, and building for math, and they’ll have me touch it. It’s very sweet and heart warming, and our school has just this really nice like climate. Where I feel, and I’m not gonna claim that it’s all me, because it’s not. We do a lot, there’s a lot of culture around asking somebody first before you move their stuff, before you touch them, or things like that. But I do just feel like there’s this heightened level of intuitiveness where they kind of are more aware of other people’s needs around them. And there’s really no teasing or anything like that in my classroom, even when people are struggling, and I hope that that carries over into the general education setting too. It’s just cute when I walk out of school, they all say hi but they know that I’m fine. I think at a lot of other, when I visit schools that aren’t mine, are often very concerned or just kind of… they don’t know how to react… and I think I’ve just kind of become a fixture of the school. And everybody’s just like, oh that’s just Caitlin. See you later. It’s just nice. It’s hard to explain the vibe.
Holly: yeah. I think it’s great sometimes when people kind of are obviously aware of your blindness and respect it, but also don’t make a huge deal out of it.
Caitlin: Exactly!
Holly: Okay you’re blind, we acknowledge that you do things differently, but hey she’s also our teacher and I’m sure she knows how to get home. Haha
Caitlin: Right! And in a lot of ways I feel like part of the scenery, which is really nice. It’s kind of refreshing after being around adults, because adults make such a big thing out of it and kids really don’t. Their just like what’s the big deal? She does things a little differently, it’s fine. It’s funny sometimes to hear them tell off the adults too wwhen they’re like trying to over-help, and they’re like she’s fine. What are you making a scene about? Yeah, it’s great!
Holly: Haha. And what do you kind of think of your plansfor the future? I mean, you said you intend to stay at that school. Do you see yourself, this being your ultimate career is being a teacher? I mean, it sounds like you’re really happy with it. So…
Caitlin: Yeah! I do really love it. I don’t know. Anything of course is possible, but I definitely think that I’m in the right place in terms of special ed and also this grade level. So who knows. I don’t know. I live in San Fransisco right now, and it’s ridiculous how expensive housing is and I live with my dad now. Which is nice, but I would definitely like to be on my own. So I’m in the process now… I would really like my own space, and for him not to judge me.
Holly: Haha. Just in case he listens
Caitlin: Right! Ha! And you know, when I eat ice cream at like midnight, I don’t need hhim being like, what are you doing with your life!!! So I’m looking into housing in San Fransisco, but if that doesn’t pan out, I can see myself moving to berkeley or somewhere. And I know in berkeley, they require you know, a certificate in Autism which I don’t have. So… who knows. If I need to move, I might stumble on some other kind of teaching or want to try general education. Who knows. I really don’t know, but I definitely want to stay in education. I just love kids, and I love going to work every day. I also love to write, and people are always afraid that I’m gonna want to become a full time author, but if I do that I feel like I wouldn’t have anything to write about. So…
Holly: You have to become really famous to become a full time author
Caitlin: well, right! That’s just it! I don’t know why people think this, but yeah so…
Holly: It really doesn’t pay the bills.
Caitlin: Exactly! So writing will be my side hustle, hopefully for the next while. Because I do really love it, and I do really want to write young adult and middle grade books for and about kids with disabilities, but also just you know kids without disabilities and just about various things. So yeah, that I hope will continue as well, but I have no lofty ambitions about turning that into my full time career at all.
Holly: Haha. Well, I guess if you do, I’ll come back and interview you about that. Haha.
Caitlin: Right! Yeah, that would be interesting because it’s true, that that in and of itself is a whole full time job to try to find and agent and editor. I’m already really struggling with all the visual aspects of that. Like the formatting, you have to like hustle on twitterand do all this stuff. It’s really stressful. So another reason I’m just sitting here shaking my head, being like I’m so glad I’m not trying to do this for my whole life. For sure.
Holly: Yeah, then you’ll have to have an author website and…
Caitlin: Oh lord, I know. I just want to hire some like young person to do all this, and can pretend to be me. Haha.
Holly: Haha. Okay, well if Caitlin ever gets a twitter we can all just wonder if it’s really her or not.
Caitlin: Oh my gosh, it’s true! I’ve said it here first. It might not be me.
Holly: And if you had someone come to you… say I’m a blind person, I want to get into teaching, what would your advice be for them?
Caitlin: Ooh, I would definitely say, make sure you find a school that really wants you there and is willing to help you. I just was really touched by how the folks at my school, were so, they were like ready to fight before I needed to fight. They were like listen ask the district for things you don’t need, and if they don’t give it to you we’re still gonna fight with them. Get everything. We are here, we want you here, let us know please what you need, because we don’t know but we will get it for you. And you know, that was just such a change for me. After that rreally frenetic and ridiculous first year. I worked with some wonderful people that first year, they didn’t know what to do and I didn’t know what to do. So it’s really nice to feel like my current administration was taking the reins and they were like ready to help me steer. So… I would definitely say, that when you interview, if they’re throwing out phrases like how are you gonna do this and are you going to be able to do that? Maybe… think twice, because you want people who are saying we want you hhere. We’re gonna make this work. Talk to me about what you need, and how we can work together to get this done. And you definitely just need to find your people and your colleagues who will be helpful to you. Obviously, finding, if you need a reader’s assistant, depending on your needs, what your teaching and your level of vision and just your preference because not everyone needs one. My district is very you know, they worry about a lot of things and I worry about a lot of things. And if one thing were to happen, to a student on my nonwatch, I don’t want to get fired. Because that’s a reality. If something happens, I don’t want to get myself in trouble, but I’m setting a bad precedent for other blind teachers in saying things can happen. I just feel very cognizant of that
Holly: Well you’re probably under a bit more scrutiny whether that’s right or not.
Caitlin: Oh for sure! And I could tell you stories about that, but I won’t, because I’ll probably get in trouble.
Holly: Haha
Caitlin: But it’s true, we are under so much scrutiny and I’m so glad that my administration does not do that and they don’t hover and they don’t worry about what’s going on in my classroom, because they let the students speak for themselves. The kids say they’re learning, and it’s fine. Anyway, if you need a reader’s assistant, it’s really great if you can find and if you can be a part of that interview process, and you find someone who you think will be a good fit. You really know what supports you do and don’t need, and you’re able to find a person who is on board with that and who will be respectful and just sort of let you steer and be the boss of your classroom and they’re just there to fill in the gaps. It’s really great when you can find a person who jives with you and it’s really fantastic. Like my reader, but she’s mine, you can’t have her. Haha
Holly: Haha. Okay, so blind people, you’re going to have to find your own. Caitlin’s not sharing her reader.
Caitlin: Right, no I’m not! Haha
Holly: Haha. Well thank you so much for sharing that advice and also for appearing on the podcast. It’s definitely been really interesting getting to talk to you about your work and find out how you got there and how you’re doing now. You are a teacher.
Caitlin: Oh thank you so much for having me, and yes it is a wonderful career path! I highly recommend it. We need more blind and disabled teachers. We really do! So if you feel like that’s your calling, I say go for it!
Holly: Alright, thank you so much. It was really really great to hear from you.
Caitlin: Thanks Holly, appreciate it.
Outro;
Holly: thanks for listening to working blind. If you like the podcast, please subscribe. For more of my advocacy initiatives including my blog, visit my website; http://catchthesewords.com you can also find me on twitter and Instagram. At catchthesewords- that’s c a t c h t h e s e w o r d s
If you have any comments or feedback, please email me: holly@catchthesewords.com